"Flutter Don’t Fool Me" by C. Alexandria Bernard

Flutter Don’t Fool Me

I know it don’t make sense.

They’re just butterflies,

all colors and grace,

floating like poems with no punctuation.

But don’t let the wings fool you.

I see them coming

and my whole body says

“nope.”

Something about how they move,

too soft,

too random,

like they know they don’t need permission

to show up

and get close.

They don’t bite,

don’t sting,

don’t growl or lunge,

but they don’t have to.

That flutter feels like a warning,

like a memory I can’t place.

They zigzag like chaos

dressed in glitter,

and I’ve met chaos before.

It didn’t need words either.

As a kid, I’d run.
Arms flailing,
screaming like they were vultures.
Other laughed,
“it’s just a butterfly,”
but fear don’t care about pretty.
Fear don’t care about gentle.
Fear just knows what it felt.

Even now, I tense up
when I see one circling,
acting all innocent
like it’s not carrying something
I can’t name
but never forgot.

Call it silly,
call it strange,
but some things flutter too close
to something deep.

And I’ve survived too much
to pretend I’m not afraid
of even the softest things
that sneak up on me.

- - -

4/7/2025

C. Alexandria Bernard is a Queer Black Non-Binary poet, survivor, and advocate who uses art as activism. A 2015 NUSPA Pioneer of Poetry, C. transforms trauma into healing through performance, teaching, and their workshop Writing to Wellness™. Featured by The New York Times and Georgetown University, C. champions justice, healing, and empowerment for marginalized communities everywhere.