the truth about karen
(1972)
in our kitchen,
women are whispering
i am not supposed to hear
it is about karen, "women thangs"
karen had almost died
almost bled to death
a coat hanger’s jagged tip
near her bare feet
across the courtyard the
temprees sang, "explain it to her mama"
karen at 16 could not explain any of it
the 32 yr old deacon
the unholy consummation
but he had told karen
what the law wouldn’t allow
old wives’ tales would
dangerous as old husband’s desires
karen stood alone
in the bathroom, in the world
quietly groping, metal inside her
hoping to avoid the wrath of rumors
like John in a desert of despair
praying for miracles & water?
he had promised this would work
but where was the water to
signal an end, to keep karen from
turning to/into her mother
whose heart she was sure to
break with this unspeakable truth
in the courtyard the "whatnauts" sang,
"i'll erase away your pain"
i was not supposed to hear
the water never came, the ambulance did
what she could not tell her mother,
soon everyone would know
the women talked of pints lost
scandals, babies, the man
& his wife, of circles, viciously
accurate & unending
the kitchen whispers, ignorant
of the school‑boy crush I wore
for karen, the pubescent flame she ignited
the fragility of a 12-year-old, who believed
in the gospel of every R&B ballad
what I was not supposed to hear,
the truth about karen, stole the
innocence from both our souls
summer of ’72, slow jams filled the courtyard
lovers held each other, slow dragged along a razor's edge
as if the truth about karen was not known
i avoided her eyes, marveled at her bulging form
wondered how she could smile,
cursed the whispered voices,
the truth, & love.
Kenneth Carroll 5/13/2022 Kenneth Carroll is a native Washingtonian. His poetry, plays, and prose have been published in numerous journals and anthologies, including 2020: The Year That Changed America (edited by Kevin Powell), Where We Stand: Poems of Black Resilience (Edited by Melanie Henderson, Enzo Silon Surin, and Truth Thomas), Fledgling Rag, Issue 21, Full Moon on K Street, Black Literature Forum and Indiana Review. Carroll's poetry appears in academic journals published by Penguin and McGraw Hill and he has two Pushcart nominations to his credit. He is the "2021 Blood Orange Review Short Fiction Winner," and the father of three beautiful children.
