The Anti-Authoritarian Call and Response: "Family Isn't Everything" by Shelley Ettinger

Family Isn't Everything

They tell you it is. They’ll say

anything to convince you.

When you demur they ask

what else matters. Well food,

for one. Housing, health care.

An end to the slaughter of

Palestinians. No more racist

killer cops. No rape. Abolish

ICE. Union wages, LGBTQ

liberation. World peace, even,

not to get too grandiose, just

saying. Silly goose they cluck.

Family is everything. It shelters

you. It nourishes. Heals. Protects

and defends (you know, like the

police)

Found family chosen family

true family it’s our queer thing

though not exclusively. Choose

your metaphor. Cocoon.

Sturdy structures with walls

and roofs. Succor. Haven.

Sanctuary. Safe space—refuge,

usually, from the original gang.

Call it community. Call it peace.

Say it shellacks you. Say it

confers immunity against the

muck and mire we currently

confront. Say it’s where you

landed if lucky

- - -

10/12/2025

Shelley Ettinger is the author of Vera’s Will (Hamilton Stone Editions, 2015). Her work has appeared or is forthcoming in Gaza Verse, Mizna, Foglifter, Rabble Review, Louisville Review, Radical Catalyst, Deceleration, Gertrude, Nimrod, Mississippi Review, Cream City Review, Stone Canoe, New Verse News, Allium, failbetter.com, and other literary journals. A Lambda Literary Foundation Emerging Writers Retreat Fellow, Shelley has been a queer, anti-racist, social justice activist for more than fifty years. Originally from Detroit, she spent most of her life in New York City and now resides in San Antonio.